How Many Kids?
by JesusisAlive2033
Summary: You know, you think that if you raise 9 kids to rid the world of evil, you would get thanked. Nope, you get visited by some heavy hitters from the Justice League and are condemned for bringing children into the crime fighting business. Whatever, it's not like you can stop your kids from beating up criminals in alleys, anyways. Especially if they learned that from you...


I don't own Young Justice. Enjoy.

"What are you doing at my house?"

Bruce was not having the best of days. Alfred was taking the week off, so that meant that he not only had to do the Batman thing without his caretaker, but he also had to deal with work, his parties, and of course, the kids.

All of the kids.

So when Clark Kent, Diana Prince, and Barry Allen all show up at his front door with strange looks on their faces (which Bruce can't place because he is just to dang tired to) he doesn't ask them to come in politely. Nope.

He gets straight to the point.

Clark smiles at him. "Hey, Bruce. Can we come in for a moment?"

"Uhhh-"

"Thanks!"

Bruce sighs, already feeling a headache coming on at 6:30 _in the morning_ (who comes by at this time in the morning?) and goes to the living room, hoping just to get this over with and that Alfred will come back as soon as possible.

Bruce ended up taking the armchair, as the couch was already filled with meta-heroes. He glared at them. "What in the world possessed you to come to my house at six-freaking-thirty in the morning? And it better be good, or so help me, I will make you wish you even got out of bed this morning."

All of them seemed a bit nervous. Clark was actually the first one to speak. "Listen, uh, Bruce? We wanted to talk to you about...well you see, don't take this the wrong way, but...We, well...uh..."

"Clark!" Bruce snapped. "Stop it with the mumbling! You know how I hate the mumbling."

Finally, as Superman sat there and Bruce seethed, Diana spoke. "We want to talk about Robin."

Bruce seemed to be caught off guard by the question, but quickly regained composure. "Ok. What about him?"

Barry rubbed the back of his head, a sure sign of nervousness. "Well, Bruce, we as a league have been talking, and we think that he's just too young. There's too much danger in this job for a kid."

Clark continued on Barry's thought. " Listen, we know that you probably train him just fine and that you care for his safety and everything, but we just want you to consider, ya know, telling him to wait until he's older."

Clark was honestly expecting a kryptonite bat glove to the face, or maybe some sort of yelling that would make him want to go cry to his momma, but the last thing he expected was for Bruce to look at him, and ask, "Ok. Which one are you talking about?"

Clark, Diana, and Barry turned to him in shock. "W-what do you mean, which one?!"

Bruce put on a look of concentration. "Well, I assume your talking about the first robin..."

Barry gulped. "First?!"

"...but I'm pretty sure that I can't tell him what to do anymore, and I guess he's not really a Robin now, either. He goes by Nightwing now. Maybe the second one, Jason is the one your looking for? I am pretty sure he's Red Hood or something, and he wouldn't listen to me anyway. Hasn't since he came back from the dead and became a mercenary..."

"Back from the dead?!"

"Mercenary?!"

Bruce shrugged, and continued to look thoughtful. "Tim is a Robin, and he probably would listen to me. Did you guys ask for Robin or Red Robin? No, you said Robin, so that rules him out..."

"How many are there?!"

Bruce than shot up with a grin on his face. "I bet you meant my assasin clone Robin! Now that one, I couldn't tell to stop whether I wanted to or not. Or maybe you meant the female Robin... Actually, you probably didn't know about her, so assasin son it is."

Barry paled. "Female Robin? Bruce, how many kids do you have? "

Bruce smirked. "Well, including those five? Maybe, ehh, 9-11, depending on your point of view."

Clark seemed horrified. "And you let them all fight crime?! Bruce?!"

Bruce put a look of innocence. "Oh my, I guess you want me to speak to all of them. It will make them so upset..."

Suddenly, the small group of leaguers noticed several figures walk in, and one particularly stood out. He was a boy that was dressed like a traffic light and had an aura of arrogance. Bruce smirked. "My goodness, _Robin_, these Justice League members want me to tell you to stop crime fighting."

The boy cracked his knuckles. " I will gladly change their minds, father."

Superman, trying his best not to look intimidated by a bunch of kids, looked squarely at Bruce. "Bruce, we as Justice League members have formally decided to remove your continuence of League membership if you continue to endanger multiple children at once."

Bruce scoffed. "Please. Didn't I quite the Justice League in the last movie we made? And besides, you bunch of hypocrites, I am not the only one that has children partners. What about your cousin Kara, Clark? Or how about Wonder Girl? Kid Flash ring a bell?"

"We don't have eleven proteges, Bruce!"

The man turned away. "Whatever. Besides, you were the one's so desperate to have me talk to Robin, why don't you talk to him yourself?"

Damian smirked. "Just to warn you, I do most of my talking with my fists."

The small group of leaguers decide it would be a good time to run, and right once they made the move too, the batclan started to chase the poor heroes, save two of them.

Bruce called to them as they left. "Be home by ten, and don't break them too much! No killing them Jason! And Damian, I better not see those daggers impaling the Flash next time I see him!"

Dick, the only other that stayed, shook his head at Bruce. "I didn't think you were that cruel, Bruce."

The man grumbled. "Well that's what happens when someone leaves me with 11 people to watch all by myself."

Dick laughed. "Enjoy your day off!" Then, the young man ran off to catch up to the rest of his family, not willing to pass up on the chance to beat up the senior heroes.

Bruce smirked, and turned on his TV, deviously watching his children beat up the other heroes like little maniacs.

Oh, how he loved his kids.


End file.
